I am glad its a short week. But the news I hear today doesn't make me any happier. Once again, there will be changes to my department's personnel. In the short span of about half a year i worked there, the number of people i saw coming in and leaving is at least a record high for me. Sometimes I wonder, why are women so scary when they are at the top of the hierarchy or when they hold so much power? And when women approach the age of menopause, things become so ugly, literally.

So much so for being the festive period.

On another note, I am proud to say that I have kept my room neat and tidy for the 4th day running. I even make it a point to vacuum daily now. What an achievement! I believe the resolutions i set for myself has reminded me how I need to change my life and be disciplined. I am going to transform into a woman who can do housechores, cook, repair, IT-savvy, care for the environment, outspoken and having great relationships with people around me.

Holiday blues

I wish the public holidays for Singapore's Chinese New Year could last for 5 days instead of the 2. The idea of returning to the work desk and the school assignments plus the unplanned BBQ is really not exciting.

If the genie can grant me one wish now, I would wish for a 2 weeks break for me to rot at home and sleep. Simple wish right?

Gong Hei Fatt Choy!

Making my last attempt to finish up the spring cleaning now, shagged!
And tonight, I shall read up on mahjong for dummies, to brush up my MJ skills before I am killed on the MJ table. I have never won at the games, so this year i'm determined not to pay more 'tuition fees' anymore.

Huat ah!

Best friend getting married

I have fewer and fewer friends to hang out these days, because many are getting off the shelf one by one. Kristy, my best friend, would be getting married tomorrow. I am happy for her, and yet, I feel a little upset, that we probably would not be able to spend more time to hang out.

Alright, I guess 2009 will be another year of attending wedding dinners. Expecting to receive a few more invitation cards.

My colleague just told me that she like my voice so much that she want to 'book' me to be her wedding emcee! Haha... I could have an alternative part-time career.

Chinese new year is coming, but there are 101 things to do! Can't afford to take leave and do my stuff because I have to reserve them for my exams and holidays.

1. spring cleaning
2. soka youth BBQ planning
3. TM chapter meeting
4. 2 school projects deadline on 2nd week after CNY
5. home visits to members

Bwah.... i am seriously panicking, not enough time! And I am dead tired after the financial accounting test. I need to invest in a voice recorder, my concentration level during the class is getting worse despite multiple cups of caffein. So i probably need this to help me. Haha... March is coming, i should get my friends to buy for me as birthday gift.

Someone asked me this, how is life being single now? Come to think of it, there isn't much difference to me. I wasn't spending enough time with him then, due to my busy schedules. So in fact, its better now that the very limited free time that I have is really free now. And that free time could be spend on either myself, or my friends.

If I ever get into another new relationship, I better make sure he has a busy lifestyle too.

I know I'm not an accountant

Whenever i'm at Financial accounting class, my mind just switched off, nothing gets absorbed. By virtue of that, i know i'm not going to be an accountant, the numbers just make me go crazy. I like things to be unbalance, so am trying my very best to make them balance now. Stupid trial balance, i hate you!

Just spend 2 hours at Kovan's Xin Wang Cafe to study for my quiz tomorrow. Singaporeans sure like to eat late... business was really good! Luckily for me, I could study despite the noise level. I could even sleep soundly with trance/house music, how cool is that?
Yesterday got back my Economics quiz results, passed with average grades despite me totally forgetting about the quiz and did not revise a single bit. I know my complency has set in, luck and wit will not carry me far, seriously need to get back to my books for real. My aim is to pass with flying colours, not average grades.

There goes my first ranting on my studies. This new blog is definitely about complains i have with my life. Bleah.

My Progress

Yet another week passed, how am I coping?

Attended my cousin's wedding lunch @ Marina Mandarin on Saturday. So 姑姑 came asking, "When is your turn?" I knew that question would be coming, shrugged off with the usual 'not so soon' answers.

In the same evening, attended the NYP ex-students' union gathering. It has been donkey years since I last saw these peeps, it was great to catch up with them. Many are just-married and a few others tagging kids along. Trends of my batch of peers seems to be marrying young and want to have kids soon. Honestly, I don't feel the pressure. I'm never ready for kids anyway.

Cavis started asking me about how C and I broke up. The conversation got me upset as I thought of him. The perspective of a married woman with kids are indeed more in-depth and wiser, but there are just some things I couldn't agree with.

I honestly don't think I am ready for any relationships. Till I get my life on track.

I am not fine

It has been a week since he send those resentful bitter emails to me. I teared as I read them, and wonder how could love translate to hatred so quickly. I was very heart-broken, and yet I refuse to cry. Colleagues been asking me if I'm alright, because I was simply too calm. Even I was surprised.

I think I might have bottled up all my tears and unhappiness, because I could feel myself getting more depress each day despite my cheerful front. I wish I could just break down and cry and stop acting like im fine.