Decluttering

Once in a while, I feel like detoxing. Getting rid of toxins in my body, as well as my mind. The body toxins gotta wait till I have the time to be home alone for a couple of days, cos the toilet has to be within walking distance. Its the toxins in my head that I want to rid of. Certain things in life are just not that 'healthy', such as, watching dramas about the perfect love that doesn't exist in real life, playing too much FB games that does not value add, and doing things that harms the health.

I guess I find the urgent need to declutter these days because I feel suffocated. No, work is not getting me down. I manage my workload well these days, I am still busy but coping well. The annoying things that makes me feel suffocating is my family. My Dad is a smoker. He used to smoke in corridoors, but he has went from bad to worse by smoking in his room now. The house has lingering cigarette smell, all thanks to him. If I get lung cancer, its probably his fault. I don't understand why my Mum is able to tolerate such shit from this irresponsible father! I don't want to argue with him again, because both our voices are loud enough to tear the house down. I chose to ignore him completely. I chose to treat him as a transparent being. My communication with him will stop, because I have tried all ways, calm, angry, sarcasm, logic, reasoning, begging and crying even... but he will never change. I can now understand why books on relationships always teaches us that its impossible to change someone, you have to accept the other party for who he is, including all his flaws. My mum did it, she accepted my Dad and his flaws. But I wonder if she is truly happy.

A friend has been feeling really down lately because of a marriage that is on the verge of breaking down. She is not pulling her socks up to get on with life. Instead, she is living each day aimlessly, like a walking dead. Another friend's wedding plan was suddenly called off, for reasons that I am not sure of till today. The groom-to-be initiated it, so my girlfriend is the upset one. Another friend is married, but the married life seems boring because the husband is more interested in computer games than the real woman in front of him, called his wife. I have more examples of unhappy couples around me, and it is scary to think of it. Of course, there are exceptions. And thanks to these good examples around me, it gives me hope that finding the right person is still possible.

But what are the odds? I wonder...